Someone told me it was better for a married couple to divorce and be happy, than to remain arguing and unhappy in the marriage
The person was implying that it was better to divorce than to seek to repair and renew the marriage.
The opinion and implication expressed in the opening statement, begs the question: what level of happiness will be achieved? … and at what cost?
In its short description of the four levels of happiness, the Spitzer Center explained that level one happiness is seeking immediate gratification.
The objective is for pleasure or to minimize pain, there is no desire for the common, intrinsic or ultimate good. This level of happiness is short lived and shallow. “If we get stuck in level one (1) our lives become a roller coaster constantly seeking to satisfy our next desire.”
So if we are to analyse the opening statement and implication, we see the desire for divorce is to “minimize” the “pain” of argument or conflict in the marriage. There may also be an unspoken desire to pursue “pleasure” in a relationship outside of the marriage.
Continuing with the idea that level one leads to a roller coaster lifestyle experience, seeking to satisfy our next desire, let’s look at divorce rates in first, second and third marriages.
Psychology Today states that “statistics have shown that in the U.S. 50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second, and 73% of third marriages end in divorce.”
The statistical evidence shows that the “happiness” achieved by a divorce does not last!
So what’s your answer … is the happiness of divorce, a “level one” happiness?
We’ll continue our discussion in my next post on this topic.
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Updated: September 28, 2019
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